How To ... BE A MALAY

1. Don’t read much.
2. Always play the victim.
3. Aim low.
4. Sell vote cheap.
5. Believe government propaganda.
6. Then believe opposition propaganda.
7. Listen to your leaders, however stupid they may be.
8. Don’t listen to opposing / alternative views.
9. Be politically inactive and watch the country crumble.
10. Be politically active. Then be naïve and fail. Or play the game and make a name/money... While watching the country crumble.
11. Ignore the teeming masses of Malays unable to save at all.
12. Allow banks to drown Malays in credit card debts.
13. Steal ideas from Malay businessmen.
14. Gerrymander the education system to leave Malays barely employable.
15. But send your children to private school.
16. Support Malay business by squeezing them for every pound of flesh that they can stand. Then squeeze some more.
17. Borrow money to spend, not expand.
18. Get a second wife.
19. Validate your life with conspicuous consumption.
20. Validate your life with conspicuous piety.
21. Get government contract / concession and sub it out.
22. Use religion to compensate your lack of success.
23. Stand eyes-wide open in awe, and watch as foreigners work like dogs to succeed in your own country.
24. Do nothing to improve your condition. But do a whole lot of envying.
25. Be the proverbial frog under the coconut shell.
26. Retain same frog-under-the-coconut-shell attitude. But now stand on top of the shell and shout it out to the world. So that everyone knows just how horribly ignorant, narrow-minded and intolerant you are.
27. Be a global citizen with global loyalty. Malaysia? Its just an address.
28. After doing all this, pour scorn on your own people and forget that you too are, alas, a Malay.